That Tree

 (Written for an art theme, based on this image)

"That tree," the foreman said solemnly, "Is an ill omen."

He surveyed the gathering he had convened, all the top foremen and the Contractor himself.

"it's not just an ill omen, it's dangerous. If that girder breaks it could bring down half the building." a workman rejoined, "And who will want the other half after that?"

The crew shook their heads morosely. That tree was a problem.

"I suppose the question is how to get rid of the thing. It wasn't there yesterday, does anyone know how it got there? Maybe we could get it off the same way," the Contractor scowled, his ire evidently raised.

"I suspect it grew there, sir." said an anonymous but respectful voice.

A vein bulged on that mighty forehead, but the Contractor restrained his wrath. "Chainsaws it is then, gentlemen. I want every man with limbs to be up there at dawn, and to hack at that thing until there's nothing left. We can turn it into mulch for the accursed playground, though that is more out of revenge than economy."

"It will be done sir," the assembly intoned. Someone accidentally said "sire." He is, no doubt, forgiven.

But the tree was not done yet. They had done engineering miracles, it was true, but of such miracles as this tree they knew nothing. The very iron-like bark of it's sides seemed to quiver with gentle laughter at the touch of the chainsaws.

They hacked at that tree with axes, pickaxes, and Axe. They brought out explosives, incendiaries and long fingernails. But nothing availed them. The tree grew on the girder, on and on, bigger and bigger. The Contractor was seen burning papers in his shiny office. A grim line or two was added to every face at the work site, and several nearby poems. They saw and end in sight, and did not like what they saw. The Contractor called a meeting.

"Gentlemen," he said, with undue respect, "The bad news is that our building project may be crippled beyond any hope of repair. But the good news is we have the world's largest, most bizarre tree."

The assembly broke into confused cheers. They'd take that.